Love in the time of Corona

March 17, 2020

 
               
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Image: Suzy Hazelwood
 
Prologue:
 
I'm choosing to be informed and responsible  about Covid-19 but not enmeshed, panicked or despondent. Currently I am more concerned about the immediate and long term impact on our personal relationships than I am with washing my hands.
 
It could be because relationships at work and at home are my primary interest  and field of focus, and I have always been just shy of a compulsive hand washer anyway, or my interest could have been piqued by the article in the Global times.

 

 

"The Global Times reported that the Chinese city of Xi'an has seen a record-high number of divorce requests in recent weeks, with some districts even maxing out the number of appointments available at local government offices. 

 

Health officials say the increase could be explained by two factors.

First, offices have been closed for a month, so are likely be hit by a wave of delayed requests now that they've re-opened, the Global Times reported. 

Secondly, many people have been quarantined in close quarters, creating an especially inflammatory environment for marital feuding."

 

I'm going with number two.  Except I will be adding quite a bit more to the inflammatory environment than just close quarters as the reason for an increase in marital (or any relationship for that matter) feuding. 

 

Here are some of the reasons I think arguments increased: 

  • Physical proximity

  • Social isolation

  • Anxiety, frustration, fear, helplessness

  • Boredom

  • Lack of work and purpose

  • Different reactions to the threat

  • Unrealistic expectations of each other

  • Miscommunication, non-communication and destructive communication

  • Discovering each other properly for the first time

 

Over the next couple of weeks I will be writing more about how you can minimise feuds while you are in isolation or quarantine and rather use the opportunity to create balance, have true conversations and deepen your relationship instead of thinking how soon you can file for divorce.


If there is anything specific that you are wondering about or struggling with, please let me know and I will try and incorporate answers or suggestions in the next chapter.

 

 

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